Instead of waiting for another day, you don't have to wait to see Episode 2 of this whole drama.
Some more background. In a post I wrote a few months ago, I mentioned that The Boyfriend had been chatting with other guys online. He's mentioned a few times that he wanted us to go hang out with this doctor friend he met online. I wanted to do it with him but every time he asked, either him, me, or the doctor had something that prevented us from getting together. Last weekend, I had to go down to Orange County. The Boyfriend called me Friday night and asked if it was okay for him to hang out with the doctor on Saturday. I completely trust him, so of course I said yes. They had lunch that day and went to see Wall-E, a movie I wanted to see when it came out, but The Boyfriend didn't want to see it. Afterwards, he told me that the doctor's a nice guy and we should all hang out together soon. I said~ sure!
Thursday came along. I woke up so very tired. I dragged myself to work but couldn't function well. I was so distracted. We chatted online and talked a few times throughout the day. He said he wanted to get away for the weekend and picked Vegas. I was all for it. I even tried to find him good deals on a hotel room. He also bought a ticket to see a show. I did smell something fishy and asked if he was going alone. He said yes immediately.
Then I came home from work. We talked some more. Although it was awkward at this point, I hugged and kissed him more. He made dinner (and burned it). We sat down and watched tv while eating. We talked to each other about other things like nothing had happened. Everything seemed fine and back to normal now.
Friday morning, he had to leave early. I really hate myself for doing this, and never expected me to do this. I turned into a psycho bitch and went to his room to find his hotel room reservation confirmation. It wasn't hard to find it. When I did, I took a look, and I literally got chills in my head, down to my chest, arms, back, and stomach. I was speechless.
I am going to type Episode 3 immediately after this. Hey was that a cliffhanger? I think I am getting good at writing soap operas.
8/16/2008
Days of Our Lives - Episode 1
This is like an episode of soap opera, so I titled the post as Days of Our Lives. I am debating whether to write about this because it's so personal. I feel so naked in front of the world to pour my thoughts out like this. It's 3:15 AM when I start writing this, but I couldn't sleep, and I really want to know what people think about the whole situation. Here it is...
Two nights ago, I came home from work as usual. I went into my room to check emails and surf as usual. The Boyfriend came to my room and asked what I wanted for my birthday. I told him instead of getting whatever I tell him I want, I would prefer that he spends time to think about what I would like. Even if it turned out to be something not at the top of my list, at least I will know that he tried and put lots of thoughts into it. He went downstairs to make dinner. We ate. I did the dishes. Just as I was walking upstairs, he asked me to come back down and sit with him in the living room. Straight off the bat, he asked me if I was happy with our relationship. I said I was. He said he hasn't been, for a long time. It came as a big shock to me. He said he's been putting up a happy face in front of me so I wouldn't worry, and at the same time trying to say things and get me to do things with him in order to fix the problems. I told him it was very surprising to me. He said it was surprising to him that it was surprising to me.
I completely did not see this coming. Some background... Throughout the past 6 years, I have to admit that I haven't treated him like a boyfriend. Sometimes I say mean and hurtful things. If you read some of the posts, you would know that I have a quick mouth and don't do too much thinking before I say things. I also haven't put in enough efforts to make him happy. A lot of the times, I just took and took and that forced him to give and give. Basically, he said he hasn't felt loved for a long time. His feelings for me gradually faded. However, just like he said, he tried to put up a happy face and acted like nothing was wrong. No wonder it was a big surprise to me when he finally sat me down and talked to me seriously about it. Even on Wednesday night when he came into my room to ask what I wanted for my birthday, that question was accompanied by a brief bj from him. I mean... how was I supposed to know that anything was wrong? As far as I know, he was still into me that night. If I had known earlier, I would have tried harder, cared more about his feelings, and paid more attention to him.
That night, we discussed our options. Option 1: (I suggested this.) I said I wanted to change and treat him the way he wants to be treated. It's not about changing who I am. It's about paying more attention to how he feels and be more considerate. Honestly this is not a lot to ask of me. I am willing to try! Option 2: (He suggested this, and I have a feeling that this was what he would eventually pick.) He wants to take a 3~4 month break. During this break, he said he may be seeing other guys, and whatever he does, it will be "safe." He was referring to sex if it's not obvious enough. He is not saying he definitely will see other guys, but he just can't say for sure that he won't. He also said that at this time, he would prefer that I wait and not see other guys. He knew it's not fair to ask me that but that's his preference. I responded that it is not going to happen like that, and in my head I was yelling a big SCREW YOU. He cannot possibly expect me to be the normal obedient wife that waits for the husband to come home every night after he fools around with other people. At this time, he said fine, I could do the same, too. (See how much he wanted Option 2?)
So our conversation basically ended here that night. We decided that we would spend a few days thinking about these options. I didn't understand why he couldn't pick option 1 immediately and work with me. It makes me feel he was leaning towards option 2 and already picked it prior to our conversion. I couldn't sleep that night. I woke up in the middle of the night to go to my room and stayed for a couple hours. I am putting Episode 2 into another post...
Two nights ago, I came home from work as usual. I went into my room to check emails and surf as usual. The Boyfriend came to my room and asked what I wanted for my birthday. I told him instead of getting whatever I tell him I want, I would prefer that he spends time to think about what I would like. Even if it turned out to be something not at the top of my list, at least I will know that he tried and put lots of thoughts into it. He went downstairs to make dinner. We ate. I did the dishes. Just as I was walking upstairs, he asked me to come back down and sit with him in the living room. Straight off the bat, he asked me if I was happy with our relationship. I said I was. He said he hasn't been, for a long time. It came as a big shock to me. He said he's been putting up a happy face in front of me so I wouldn't worry, and at the same time trying to say things and get me to do things with him in order to fix the problems. I told him it was very surprising to me. He said it was surprising to him that it was surprising to me.
I completely did not see this coming. Some background... Throughout the past 6 years, I have to admit that I haven't treated him like a boyfriend. Sometimes I say mean and hurtful things. If you read some of the posts, you would know that I have a quick mouth and don't do too much thinking before I say things. I also haven't put in enough efforts to make him happy. A lot of the times, I just took and took and that forced him to give and give. Basically, he said he hasn't felt loved for a long time. His feelings for me gradually faded. However, just like he said, he tried to put up a happy face and acted like nothing was wrong. No wonder it was a big surprise to me when he finally sat me down and talked to me seriously about it. Even on Wednesday night when he came into my room to ask what I wanted for my birthday, that question was accompanied by a brief bj from him. I mean... how was I supposed to know that anything was wrong? As far as I know, he was still into me that night. If I had known earlier, I would have tried harder, cared more about his feelings, and paid more attention to him.
That night, we discussed our options. Option 1: (I suggested this.) I said I wanted to change and treat him the way he wants to be treated. It's not about changing who I am. It's about paying more attention to how he feels and be more considerate. Honestly this is not a lot to ask of me. I am willing to try! Option 2: (He suggested this, and I have a feeling that this was what he would eventually pick.) He wants to take a 3~4 month break. During this break, he said he may be seeing other guys, and whatever he does, it will be "safe." He was referring to sex if it's not obvious enough. He is not saying he definitely will see other guys, but he just can't say for sure that he won't. He also said that at this time, he would prefer that I wait and not see other guys. He knew it's not fair to ask me that but that's his preference. I responded that it is not going to happen like that, and in my head I was yelling a big SCREW YOU. He cannot possibly expect me to be the normal obedient wife that waits for the husband to come home every night after he fools around with other people. At this time, he said fine, I could do the same, too. (See how much he wanted Option 2?)
So our conversation basically ended here that night. We decided that we would spend a few days thinking about these options. I didn't understand why he couldn't pick option 1 immediately and work with me. It makes me feel he was leaning towards option 2 and already picked it prior to our conversion. I couldn't sleep that night. I woke up in the middle of the night to go to my room and stayed for a couple hours. I am putting Episode 2 into another post...
8/15/2008
It's Over
I am so confused right now. I don't know what to do. I need a rebound guy. If you know any quality individuals in the Los Angeles area, let me know. Maybe pretty soon there will be posts about The Boyfriend V 2.0.
I will try to write something this weekend and tell you guys what happened.
I will try to write something this weekend and tell you guys what happened.
8/13/2008
8/12/2008
The Olympics
I am sure a lot of you saw the Men's 10-Meter Synchronized Diving yesterday. The two men representing the USA are so adorable. I just have to find more pictures of them and post them here.
Thomas Finchum (born December 01, 1989):
David Boudia (Born April 24, 1989):
These two boys not only compete against each other, but they also compete together as a team against other hot boys from other countries. They are good friends with each other, and during the interview, they even said they could finish each other's sentences sometimes. How adorable is that!!! Look how cute they look together.
What's even better about them is that Thomas is 18 and David is 19, so they are both legal. LOL. I am only kidding!!
Thomas Finchum (born December 01, 1989):
David Boudia (Born April 24, 1989):
These two boys not only compete against each other, but they also compete together as a team against other hot boys from other countries. They are good friends with each other, and during the interview, they even said they could finish each other's sentences sometimes. How adorable is that!!! Look how cute they look together.
What's even better about them is that Thomas is 18 and David is 19, so they are both legal. LOL. I am only kidding!!8/03/2008
Happy Sunday
Good morning! First I'd like to apologize to my three readers that I haven't updated this blog for so long. I was busy and lazy. I haven't had time read any blogs, either. Work is the same for me... just too much work to do and too little time to do it. Our company recently hired a masseuse to come over every other week to give us massages. To me, that's a great perk. The massage I had last week was excellent and much needed. I just wish it was a guy and longer (the massage session, not a particular human reproductive organ). Anyone who wants to apply to be an intern, see qualifications here.
So I hurt my big toe a week ago. The Boyfriend was trying to "get me" and was chasing me in the house. I ran into the door. My toe began swelling right away and I could not walk. I thought I might have broken it. That night I had to hop around the house. Of course, being mentally 5 years old, The Boyfriend started making fun of me and called me a kangaroo. A couple hours later, he hurt his toe, too, while getting out of shower. What can I say? Karma is a bitch!
I went to see a doctor the next day and got an X-ray. Good news, it wasn't broken. The doctor told me to go see Dr. Advil and a few days later, the inflammation was gone. Magical Dr. Advil! I think I am addicted to him now. Now I can karate kick The Boyfriend with no problem.
Yesterday The Boyfriend and I went to Walmart to get a few things. He got a canned air, and I guess there is a requirement that you would have to be 18 to buy it? I am not sure... Anyway, the cashier (an old woman in her 60's) asked him how old he was. Since he likes to flirt with grandmas, he didn't answer and instead asked her how old she thought he was. (By the way, he's in late 20's.) The grandma said "uh... I don't know... you look young... maybe 17?"
I immediately pointed to the eye clinic/glasses department, which was next to us, and said to her, word by word, "I think you need to have your eyes checked over there." It sounded funny at first but then I realized it might have been a little rude. She gave me this weird look when I said it. I am sorry, but I am just an obnoxious Asian who only became obnoxious after hanging out with too many Gringos. They rubbed off on me. I couldn't help it!!
You had no idea how big The Boyfriend's head (the upper division of the human body that contains the brain, chief sense organs, and the mouth, NOT the tip of a certain human reproductive organ) was that afternoon. I had to keep reminding him that just because an old woman with blurred vision thought he looked 17, it doesn't mean the rest of the world thinks so, too.
So I hurt my big toe a week ago. The Boyfriend was trying to "get me" and was chasing me in the house. I ran into the door. My toe began swelling right away and I could not walk. I thought I might have broken it. That night I had to hop around the house. Of course, being mentally 5 years old, The Boyfriend started making fun of me and called me a kangaroo. A couple hours later, he hurt his toe, too, while getting out of shower. What can I say? Karma is a bitch!
I went to see a doctor the next day and got an X-ray. Good news, it wasn't broken. The doctor told me to go see Dr. Advil and a few days later, the inflammation was gone. Magical Dr. Advil! I think I am addicted to him now. Now I can karate kick The Boyfriend with no problem.
Yesterday The Boyfriend and I went to Walmart to get a few things. He got a canned air, and I guess there is a requirement that you would have to be 18 to buy it? I am not sure... Anyway, the cashier (an old woman in her 60's) asked him how old he was. Since he likes to flirt with grandmas, he didn't answer and instead asked her how old she thought he was. (By the way, he's in late 20's.) The grandma said "uh... I don't know... you look young... maybe 17?"
I immediately pointed to the eye clinic/glasses department, which was next to us, and said to her, word by word, "I think you need to have your eyes checked over there." It sounded funny at first but then I realized it might have been a little rude. She gave me this weird look when I said it. I am sorry, but I am just an obnoxious Asian who only became obnoxious after hanging out with too many Gringos. They rubbed off on me. I couldn't help it!!
You had no idea how big The Boyfriend's head (the upper division of the human body that contains the brain, chief sense organs, and the mouth, NOT the tip of a certain human reproductive organ) was that afternoon. I had to keep reminding him that just because an old woman with blurred vision thought he looked 17, it doesn't mean the rest of the world thinks so, too.
7/29/2008
Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince - Trailer
The first trailer of the sixth Harry Potter movie - Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince came out TODAY. I can't wait to see the movie.
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